~*~Becoming a man~*~

[esa]

Isn't that what they call it? When boys go out and do something that is grown up...that's the day that they cease to be boys and become men. Well, yesterday, I became a man.
I got my first deer.
Yep. All by me onsies.
With just a little help from my car.
Irony is me hunting for just a few years...learning that I love my bow...never getting a deer but having a great time...and the year we (james and myself) decide we won't hunt (due to the hunting liscense becoming so expensive now) I get my deer...
And that's the hardest thing in the world I've found...I can't be angry at the damn thing for wrecking my car...but I'm angry with myself that I wasn't quicker with the breaks...that I had to watch her last 15 minutes of her life talking to her till she passed...
So, my emotions ran strong today. I felt bad about killing her. I laughed when I was pronounced the Great White Deer Killer. I shook my head when I was told it wasn't hunting season but fishing season now. I got sick that I coulda' went off the road and did more damage than I did. And I'm at the point in time where I have no idea what's going to become of my car...the first car I've owned.

So in honor of me "becoming a man"...anyone have any good road kill stories?

Oh...and the other high point...I've found out that I truely have a good cd player...it never skipped a beat....

[bassist4life2004]

I was coming home from altoon on 22. From the corner of my eye i see a cat coming across the road, and that specific road is a 65 mph speed limit, so, i was doin about 80. I was in my dodge spirit, and that cat came out and lifted its head a little too high. When I hit that cat, it cut its head clean off, and the head went flying over my car and left a red streak up the back of my car. I saw, in slow motion, this cats head flying through the air. And while this was the sickest thing ive ever seen in my life, it was also the funniest thing ive ever seen. I know, im sadistic, but how many times can you honestly say you decapitated an animal with the spoiler of ur car.

[Bag]

Esa, just thank god you didn't swerve! I have two kids driving and I pounded that into their heads early, and often. Hit the brakes, but DO NOT SWERVE. Lot's of humans die trying to miss animals. I'd rather have you around than some damn "forest rat" anyday!

And, because I'm an AVID motorcyclist, feel free to hit, shoot, blow up, kill those damn things year round! I just came back from Danville(Geissinger) from visiting a friend who was wrecked by one on the Pa. Reunion Ride. He had neck surgery this morning for 3 hairline fractures. The prognosis is good though, the doctors think he'll be able to fully recover, but its gonna take months.

Bag (Officially permitting year-round deer season!)

[oobie]

yeah i agree with bag just hit the breaks or don't even to that. I rolled a jeep because i swerved to miss a deer one time.

I do have a pretty funny story about hitting an owl. I was on my way home one night it was pretty late when all of the sudden i caught this thing out of the corner of my eye and then BAM i hit it didn't know what it was and was afraid it was someones cat or dog so i turned around and went back to find a nice big owl laying in the middle of the road and it was still partially alive. i didn't know what to do since they are a protected animal so i pulled it off the road and it eventually died(or so i thought)!!! when it died i picked it up and sat it in my jeep and was taking it home and was going to call the Game commission to come get it. when i got home i pulled in and then i got out to shut the Jeep off, i look over and there is the OWL looking right at me. I ran in the house and grabbed a camera and got a picture of it so nobody thought i was BSing and my mom and i laughed for hours about it.

Bag sorry to hear about your buddy send him a get well from me, but i will tell you from living in mountains that was always my biggest fear was cracking a dear or bear on my bike, but i have since moved to duncansville and now its even worse, i got put up with crazy f@#$s that don't know how to look both ways or look in there mirrors.

[Jim Price]

Fortunately, I don't have any real good roadkill stories to share. I tend to drive slowly at night and have good reflexes, so I haven't taken out too many critters so far in my driving career...Especially fortunate, given the number of miles I log going to check out bands, deliver magazines, etc.

I've hit the occasional rabbit, squirrel or chipmunk, and one opossum near Ashville a few years ago (it's the only one of those I ever hit, thus I remember where I hit it); never a skunk or a deer.

A deer hit me once a couple of years ago while I was driving to the Selina benefit in Mount Union. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the buck stepping off the hill onto Route 22 near Geeseytown. There was no oncoming traffic, so I swerved and he glanced off the right rear of my car, leaving only a small scuff mark where he made contact. Whew!

Back around 1990, I had driven up to Gallitzin to see a jam night at Frank's Pier. I accidentally locked my keys in my car, and bar owner Frank offered to drive me back down the hill to Altoona to get my spare car key. Frank decided to come through Buckhorn and drive over to Wopsy on Skyline Drive to come in through Juniata. He was doing a pretty good clip on Skyline Drive when we came upon a herd of deer on the road. Frank jammed on his brakes, and the tires screeched as we headed into the herd. Frank hit one deer, but had slowed enough that it amounted to a 'love tap' on the deer's rear end. The deer stood there and looked at the car, seemingly thinking "Is that the best you can do?," before strutting off into the woods. Once again, whew!

[Mackovyak]

I think Matt from Lost Ledney and Ever Since Yesterday has the record for number of deer killed with a vehicle in the span of a few months. I think he must give off those phermones or something.

[Matt_22]

I've claimed six deer in one summer!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[facingwest]

When I had my '86 S10 Blazer, it holds the record for most road kills for me.

I landed my first deer with it. I used to run sound for Deno and the Emotions and one night before one of their gigs the deer ran out in front of me. I sent that thing sailing!!! If there's any bonus for hang time, I would've gotten it. I was fortunate only to have smashed out my plastic grill which caused the headlight to become cock-eyed. My dad and I went back for the deer and brought it home. Something we found out about road kill is that you can't use any of the meat from it.

A few months after that heading to the studio, I got deer #2. This time, nothing at all happened to the Blazer.

Chipmunks hold the record for most kills. In St. Benedict, those things must breed like mad. I landed a snake, a skunk, and a few birds as well.

My most recent is whenever Kenny and I were coming back from Key West last year, we had to take a detour on US1 because of road construction or something. We ran over a friggin alligator!!!! I don't know if I can claim this one or not though because the car in front of me ran it over first. I don't know if we killed it because it had to have been 5 feet long and wasn't going back to see.

[Imgrimm01]

These two will sound like lies BUT I SWEAR they are true... me and 2 of my buddies were out drinkin ( yes and driving ) ( I know ) any way we hit a horse !! I swear A HORSE and yes we Fukkin killed it, DEAD , and this one isn't mine but I have to tell it, My Friend and yours Otto Hit an EMU UH HUH YUP an EMU !

[Ron]

... My Friend and yours Otto Hit an EMU UH HUH YUP an EMU !

LMAO

[DMFJ03]

Friend: "Dude! There's a groundhog...hit it!"
Ex-Girl: "No don't hit it!"
Me: "It's over the ditch and ten feet into that guys yard I'd never hit it."
Friends Ex: "Aww look, it's trying to race us...run little..."

***thump thump thump***

Friend: "You got em'!!!"
Ex Girl: *begins to slap the shit out of me and my friend*
Me: "Damn, woman...It's not like I tried to hit him!"
Ex Girl: I *slap* don't *slap* freakin *slap* care! *slap*

[ImAGrimmette]

First off - I'm a Bambi lover! And I hit my first deer a couple of years ago heading up to the Tonkin Estate in Fallentimber. I was cruising along thinking boy I haven't seen any deer this trip up - then WHAM!!!! go around a bend and 3 of them were standing there on the road. I hit the brakes but not quick enough and I took one them out. I couldn't stand the site of it so I had to drive a couple of miles down the road till I couldn't see it in my rearview mirror anymore - then I got out to check the damage on my Explorer. It wasn't too bad - but what got me was the fur! I had Bambi's fur on my grill -

Anyways... I was sick - shaking - stupified - crying - and still had a ways to go to the Tonkin Estate. When I arrived the guys were practicing for the upcoming Resurruption show, so I stood in the doorway waiting for them to finish the song. Bob was closest to me and kept looking at me (probably still had fear written all over my face!) finally he said are you Ok, I said No - I just hit a deer - which echoed thru Bob's mic and everyone stopped playing at once (kinda funny now!) My Boys made sure I was OK and then checked out the damage and the vehicle to make sure there was nothing leaking. Everything checked out A-OK!

Kinda put a damper on band practice, but we did accomplish other things that needed to be done for the show. And Ron followed me back to Altoona to make sure I made it home safely.

The Great White Hunter I never wanted to be! But I'm glad to say I survived my first Deer Kill and I'm glad I have GREAT FRIENDS!!!!!

Grimmette Lisa

[ToonaRockGuy]

I bet Woofburger mows down deer all the time, gets out of his super muscle car, fucks the roadkill, then skins it with his bare hands, takes off his aviator sunglasses and uses the suns focused light through them to cook up the deer, eats it right then and there, then gets back in his super muscle car and takes off.

While never mussing a hair on his head.

[byndrsn]

First off - I'm a Bambi lover!

HEY!! Me too!!! They are tasty!!!

[JeffLeeper]

Hey , I'm a non-drinker and I still have hit a few. Even had one jump off a hill on the roadside onto my hood....That station wagon was cursed.

My brother-in-law hit one with it...I hit 2...my neighbor hit 1....I think it was seriously cursed....I was afraid to drive to gigs.

The worst one was when one ran into my parked car , half-braining itself while knocking out the passenger window.

My uncle lassoed the staggering doe , and butchered it that day. Not enough meat to pay for a new window , but not bad...Try to explain that one to the insurance.

I finally junked that car.....and havn't had venison since.

[Staceman]

I've hit a few over the years, never done any major damage thankfully.

I witnessed quite a nasty hit though. About 10 or so years ago, I was on my way back from the in-laws, driving back from New Kensington on 22, and was nearing Ebensburg. Right at one of those places where the lanes narrow down, in the distance I saw a deer start running out onto the road. It was headed right into the path of a Baretta/Lumina or something a ways in front of me. As it got into their path, it jumped, and ended up smashing their windshield, even slightly caving in the front part of the roof. Anyway, when it hit, it was launched straight up into the air. I swear, it was so surreal it reminded me of something from a cartoon, it went so high, and almost in slow motion. I slowed down luckily, and it landed not far in front of me.

I stopped and offered assistance. They were alright, and didn't say much to me beyond the one guy flipping out about it being his sister's car.

[songsmith]

Aside from my recent Honda-bashing incident, I actually killed two bucks at once with a VW BEETLE. They jumped off a dugout above after being spooked by a guy at his house, landed ass-over-tincups on the road and I hit the both of them, and did ZERO damage to the Beetle, I swear it. I had a passenger in the car who can corroborate.

Funny that Esa equated killing a deer to becoming a man... it's an age-old rite of passage for many of us, and part of the deal is the remorse you feel for having killed something. Believe me, remorse is a normal reaction, unless you happen to be a serial killer. Man has been a hunter-gatherer since time immemorial, and hunting is a biological drive in us, but you never forget that remorse at taking a life. Deer can be beautiful creatures (especially browned with green peppers and onions on a seeded bun, but I digress), and they're amazing athletes. I'll tell you, though, what I tell my wife when she hits an animal... Survival of the fittest is how nature works... the really smart ones don't step out in front of cars.---->JMS

[Ron]

Staceman... here you go; Same type car and similar strike, but a different animal. Good thing we don't have many moose (mooses?) (meese?) (meeses?) around here. The poor lady driving ended up with just a broken hand.

[YankeeRose]

but 6 in 1 Summer beats a Grand Total of 4 in 11 months!!! YEA!!! The first 3 that hit me were in 4 months, exactly to the day. The damage was very slight, only to the headlights. (Snow did that car in.) Only 1 that hit me died, that I know of, the third one. I'm a "Bambi Lover" too, but when deer keep hitting your car as if it's a homing device, you tend to get a bit angry...the first young one hit my car on I-80 in broad daylight. I couldn't avoid it, there was too much traffic. It shook its head, got up and trotted off. When the second one stuck its head out from high weeds on 53, had a bloody nose and was stunned, I talked to it and petted it until it was on its feet and walked away, the third one was instantly dead and I was MAD! The 4th one that I hit when it leaped out in front of the car and stopped, the IDIOT, just last Thursday - if I hadn't taken Juniata Gap, due to advice that said, "there are less cops" that way (Thanks! ), maybe I wouldn't have hit it? There was no damage to the car, thankfully, as I was able to just about stop in time and only tapped it. That deer looked at me too, as if to say, "is that the best you can do"? I didn't own that car, it was a rental and is "back whence it came", so I'm very happy that there was no damage!

[HurricaneBob]

The Deer Hawk story.

Back in the Rapid Fire days, we were leaving some polish club up the mountain. Steve Oswald, Jeff Wallack, John Scarfone and I piled into Steves Skyhawk and down the road we went. Steve pulls over and asks me to drive because he's falling asleep, so i jump behind the wheel and pull out. Just when i get it to 65mph bambi runs right out and ruins a perfectly good radiator. Steam blowing out the hood i pull over to the side of the road and everyones still sleeping! I wake up Steve and tell him that we hit a deer and he says " You hit a gaurdrail didnt ya!" I said no man it was a deer! I said cmon, so we walk back about a 100 yards and luckily there she was in the grass. I said there! There's the proof!

State police show up and radio a tow truck for us. Now over the radio the trooper said there were 2 males and 2 females in the car. Seeing Jeff and Johns longhair in the backseat. Just so happens Steves wife heard this on the police scanner! Oh boy! Some splainin to do there! LOL

So Steve got to keep the deer and threw it in the back of the tow truck with John. Jeff and i got a ride home from the troopers. I still can remember Jeff busting on the troopers all the way home, oh man it was funny. The troopers ask where we want dropped off and i say take me to sandwich saloon! I can still hear jeff roaring as they pulled out to take him home. Steve's car from then on was called the Deerhawk!

[songsmith]

Yankee Rose, and everyone else not really familiar with deer please note:
Deer are wild animals. DO NOT touch them or even get close enough to touch them. A deer is by far not defenseless, and can kill you. Every experienced hunter makes real sure the damn thing's dead before he gets too close, because an animal that can jump 30 horizontal feet can also use those hooves to kick the living crap out of you, and those hoofies are sharp enough to go through a metal car hood, I've seen it. Farm-raised buck are even dangerous, there are several local instances of people being killed by rutting buck... they put their heads down and come at you with 8 or 10 spear points and 175 lbs of weight at 35 mph.
Really, this goes for every kind of wild animal... raccoons are common rabies carriers, but ANY warm-blooded animal can be rabid, and PA is one of the top rabies states now... skunks, foxes, even cats and dogs are carriers, and don't show symptoms until right before they die.
Hate to be a buzz-kill here, but I don't want anyone to get hurt thinking of a deer as Bambi. ---->JMS

[DMFJ03]

No kidding, John.

Make sure it is good and dead before you even get near it.

[esa]

No kidding, John.

Make sure it is good and dead before you even get near it.

How would you know? You have yet to shoot one hunting let alone go near it.
::beams all proud of herself::
Ahem... Ownage?

[DMFJ03]

Women, I've had my hands up inside a deers chest cavity, pulling out its heart and a lungs already.

Get your ownage straight.

[esa]

Yeah and just because you put kittens in an oven, doesn't make 'em biscuts either...