I can't watch those animal rescue shows. They literally make me cry.---->JMSf.sciarrillo wrote:. I usually watch that animal cops on animal planet and I can't understand while some people treat their pets the way some of them on their do. A dog, cat or any other type of pet you have is part of your family; and should be treated as such. They should be loved for and cared for as much as one of your kids are. After all, they are like your kids ..
I got new puppy for the wife. What kind of dog do you have?
Re: Skunk remedy
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SavageHeart
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YankeeRose
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- Joined: Saturday Oct 09, 2004
- Location: Altunea, PA
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Pet Humor
"How To Bathe Your Cat"
1. Thoroughly clean toliet.
2. Lift both lids and add shampoo.
3. Find and soothe cat as you carry it to the bathroom.
4. In one swift move, place cat in toliet, close both lids and stand on top so cat cannot escape.
5. The cat will self-agitate and produce ample suds. (Ignore ruckus from inside the toliet, the cat is enjoying this!)
6. Flush toliet 3 or 4 times. This provides a power rinse, which is quite effective.
7. Have someone open outside door, stand as far from toliet as possible and quickly open both lids.
8. Clean cat will rocket out of the toilet and outdoors, where he will air dry!
Sincerely,
The Dog
"Letter to Pets"
Dear Dog and/or Cat,
When I say to move, it means go someplace else, not switch positions with each other so there are still two of you in the way.
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. (Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate & food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food & dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.)
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the
object. Tripping me doesn't help
because I fall faster than you can
run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king size bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue to sleep on the couch to ensure your comfort. Look at
videos of dogs and cats sleeping. They can actually curl up in a ball. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. (I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space used is nothing but sarcasm.)
My compact discs are not miniature Frisbees.
For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob, or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. (In addition, I have been using the bathroom for years, Canine or Feline attendance is not mandatory.)
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog's or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough! It would be such a simple change for you.
To pacify you I have posted the following message on our front door:
Rules for non-pet owners who visit and like to complain about my/our pets:
1. They live here; you don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your
clothes, stay off the furniture.
3. I like my pet better than I like most people.
4. To you it's an animal. To me, he and/or she is an adopted son and/or daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours, and is speech challenged.
Dogs and cats are better than kids
because:
They eat less.
Don't ask for money all the time.
Are easier to train.
Usually come when called.
Never drive your car.
Don't hang out with drug using friends.
Don't drink or smoke.
Don't worry about buying the latest
fashions.
Don't wear your clothes.
Don't need a gazillion dollars for college.
If they get pregnant you can sell or give away the results.
"Pet Diary Excerpts"
The Dog's Diary
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
The Cat's Diary
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little, dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Jerks!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies". I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded! The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...
"How To Bathe Your Cat"
1. Thoroughly clean toliet.
2. Lift both lids and add shampoo.
3. Find and soothe cat as you carry it to the bathroom.
4. In one swift move, place cat in toliet, close both lids and stand on top so cat cannot escape.
5. The cat will self-agitate and produce ample suds. (Ignore ruckus from inside the toliet, the cat is enjoying this!)
6. Flush toliet 3 or 4 times. This provides a power rinse, which is quite effective.
7. Have someone open outside door, stand as far from toliet as possible and quickly open both lids.
8. Clean cat will rocket out of the toilet and outdoors, where he will air dry!
Sincerely,
The Dog
"Letter to Pets"
Dear Dog and/or Cat,
When I say to move, it means go someplace else, not switch positions with each other so there are still two of you in the way.
The dishes with the paw prints are yours and contain your food. The other dishes are mine and contain my food. (Please note, placing a paw print in the middle of my plate & food does not stake a claim for it becoming your food & dish, nor do I find that aesthetically pleasing in the slightest.)
The stairway was not designed by NASCAR and is not a racetrack. Beating me to the bottom is not the
object. Tripping me doesn't help
because I fall faster than you can
run.
I cannot buy anything bigger than a king size bed. I am very sorry about this. Do not think I will continue to sleep on the couch to ensure your comfort. Look at
videos of dogs and cats sleeping. They can actually curl up in a ball. It is not necessary to sleep perpendicular to each other stretched out to the fullest extent possible. (I also know that sticking tails straight out and having tongues hanging out the other end to maximize space used is nothing but sarcasm.)
My compact discs are not miniature Frisbees.
For the last time, there is not a secret exit from the bathroom. If by some miracle I beat you there and manage to get the door shut, it is not necessary to claw, whine, meow, try to turn the knob, or get your paw under the edge and try to pull the door open. I must exit through the same door I entered. (In addition, I have been using the bathroom for years, Canine or Feline attendance is not mandatory.)
The proper order is kiss me, then go smell the other dog's or cat's butt. I cannot stress this enough! It would be such a simple change for you.
To pacify you I have posted the following message on our front door:
Rules for non-pet owners who visit and like to complain about my/our pets:
1. They live here; you don't.
2. If you don't want their hair on your
clothes, stay off the furniture.
3. I like my pet better than I like most people.
4. To you it's an animal. To me, he and/or she is an adopted son and/or daughter who is short, hairy, walks on all fours, and is speech challenged.
Dogs and cats are better than kids
because:
They eat less.
Don't ask for money all the time.
Are easier to train.
Usually come when called.
Never drive your car.
Don't hang out with drug using friends.
Don't drink or smoke.
Don't worry about buying the latest
fashions.
Don't wear your clothes.
Don't need a gazillion dollars for college.
If they get pregnant you can sell or give away the results.
"Pet Diary Excerpts"
The Dog's Diary
8:00 am - Dog food! My favorite thing!
9:30 am - A car ride! My favorite thing!
9:40 am - A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
10:30 am - Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
12:00 pm - Milk bones! My favorite thing!
1:00 pm - Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
3:00 pm - Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
5:00 pm - Dinner! My favorite thing!
7:00 pm - Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
8:00 pm - Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
11:00 pm - Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!
The Cat's Diary
Day 983 of my captivity.
My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little, dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets. Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.
The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet. Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates my capabilities. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a "good little hunter" I am. Jerks!
There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of "allergies". I must learn what this means, and how to use it to my advantage.
Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow, but at the top of the stairs.
I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released, and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded! The bird must be an informant. I observe him communicate with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now...
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RobTheDrummer
- Diamond Member
- Posts: 5227
- Joined: Tuesday Dec 10, 2002
- Location: Tiptonia, Pa
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HurricaneBob
- AA Member
- Posts: 2790
- Joined: Monday Dec 09, 2002
- Location: /root/2/pub
- Contact:
My nephews Dogwatch Hidden Fence company.
http://www.dogwatchcpa.com
Cheaper than fencing your property.
http://www.dogwatchcpa.com
Cheaper than fencing your property.
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DirtySanchez
- Diamond Member
- Posts: 4186
- Joined: Tuesday Feb 14, 2006
- Location: On teh internetz
- Contact:
I have an American Bulldog named Savannah and My wife has a Chihuahua named Cheetoh.
Sometimes I feel like giving them both to Michael Vick. My Bulldog ate my pool table, and Cheetoh bites the shit out of me.
Sometimes I feel like giving them both to Michael Vick. My Bulldog ate my pool table, and Cheetoh bites the shit out of me.
"You are now either a clueless inbred brownshirt Teabagger, or a babykilling hippie Marxist on welfare."-Songsmith
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PanzerFaust
- Diamond Member
- Posts: 1547
- Joined: Sunday Dec 08, 2002
- Location: Western Front
- Contact:
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metalchurch
- Diamond Member
- Posts: 3719
- Joined: Friday Feb 09, 2007
- Location: Somerset
I got new puppy
Here's a picture of my Dog, his name is Chapman. We call him Duane for short, sometimes Braa.
his pic was taken in late winter so he's done a bit of growing since then.