Conservative/Liberal Joke

ToonaRockGuy · Post by **ToonaRockGuy** » Wednesday Dec 14, 2005

Thought this joke was funny...

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered
altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him,
"Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet
him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air
balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet
above sea level. You are 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and
100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude."

She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Conservative."

"I am," replied the man. "How did you know?"

"Well," answered the balloonist, "everything you told me is
technically correct, but I have no idea what to make of your
information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much
help to me."

The man smiled and responded, "You must be a Liberal."

"I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?"

"Well," said the man, "you have no idea where you are or where you're
going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air.
You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and you expect
ME to solve your problem. You're in EXACTLY the same position you were
in before we met, but somehow, now it's MY fault!

FretBored · Post by **FretBored** » Wednesday Dec 14, 2005

HA! Good One!

SpellboundByMetal · Post by **SpellboundByMetal** » Wednesday Dec 14, 2005

hahaha very funny

RobTheDrummer · Post by **RobTheDrummer** » Wednesday Dec 14, 2005

So true...

Bert|Evil · Post by **Bert|Evil** » Wednesday Dec 14, 2005

Sounds like an arguement between my girlfriend and me.

Mo Lester · Post by **Mo Lester** » Wednesday Dec 14, 2005

Banned · Post by **Banned** » Wednesday Dec 14, 2005

Toona, Great Great Great... about sums up the whole enchilata in one short story.

FretBored · Post by **FretBored** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

You know you're a right winger if you believe that if you stop spending money on it, a social problem will just go away.

Banned · Post by **Banned** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

First of all, where in the constutution does it says we must do anything about social problems?
The word social derives from society, that is the people, us, and we on our own (NOT tax dollars) should help social problems.
It should be done the way is was done for 150 years before democrats thought throwing money at problems would help (it does help them get elected every 4 years by the people who let themselves be controlled as victoms).
Local civic organizations, churches and just philanthrophy from caring individuals got us through most of our history.

You must be liberal if you think thowing money at a problem generation after generation will still get that fix.

What is that quote...madness is when you keep doing the same thing over and over and expect a different outcome.

Bert|Evil · Post by **Bert|Evil** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

undercoverjoe wrote:First of all, where in the constutution does it says we must do anything about social problems?
The word social derives from society, that is the people, us, and we on our own (NOT tax dollars) should help social problems.
It should be done the way is was done for 150 years before democrats thought throwing money at problems would help (it does help them get elected every 4 years by the people who let themselves be controlled as victoms).
Local civic organizations, churches and just philanthrophy from caring individuals got us through most of our history.

You must be liberal if you think thowing money at a problem generation after generation will still get that fix.

What is that quote...madness is when you keep doing the same thing over and over and expect a different outcome.

Word!!!!

Bert|Evil · Post by **Bert|Evil** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

FretBored wrote:You know you're a right winger if you believe that if you stop spending money on it, a social problem will just go away.

Take the Welfare program, for example. If we stop funding it, maybe these people will get jobs and stop having kids that they can't afford. PROBLEM SOLVED!!

FretBored · Post by **FretBored** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

undercoverjoe wrote:First of all, where in the constutution does it says we must do anything about social problems?
The word social derives from society, that is the people, us, and we on our own (NOT tax dollars) should help social problems.
It should be done the way is was done for 150 years before democrats thought throwing money at problems would help (it does help them get elected every 4 years by the people who let themselves be controlled as victoms).
Local civic organizations, churches and just philanthrophy from caring individuals got us through most of our history.

You must be liberal if you think thowing money at a problem generation after generation will still get that fix.

What is that quote...madness is when you keep doing the same thing over and over and expect a different outcome.

I'm don't classify myself as a liberal or conserative just an American.

I guess a better solution would be to throw billions at wars...

Didn't we learn our lesson in Nam?

We sure do try to fix the rest of the worlds social problems without there permission or even asking for it. I guess I'll just trot down to the local Salvation Army when I need a hot meal or when they shut off the gas and lights.

I think the government just about has the nation(people) under control.

ToonaRockGuy · Post by **ToonaRockGuy** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

WHOA! WHOA! I just posted a joke. I wasn't after a heated discussion on government. We've debated all this before. Sorry, but can't we just let this one go, for the sake of my sanity?

FretBored · Post by **FretBored** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

OK the joke was funny! Didn't mean to start a civil war.

I'll leave the rest of this to Rush Limbaugh and Alex Jones: http://www.infowars.com/

"Fall mountains just don't fall on me." - Jimi Hendrix

Banned · Post by **Banned** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

Sorry Kev, but why do people want to take my money when they have their gas shut off? where does anyone have the attitude that hardworking Americans shoud have money taken from them by someone else thinks they are entitled to it?

Who brought up war or Nam? That is such a knee jerk reaction it is a cliche by itself.

Be generous and open hearted, just keep your hands out of my pockets.

If our tax rates were back to what our parents and grandparents paid, there would be a lot left over for charity.

Marsman365 · Post by **Marsman365** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

Oh boy, here we go again...

(Although it's been a while since we've had a good political debate on Rockpage!)

Thanks "ToonaRockGuy" LOL

DMFJ03 · Post by **DMFJ03** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

lonewolf · Post by **lonewolf** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

FretBored wrote:You know you're a right winger if you believe that if you stop spending money on it, a social problem will just go away.

My doctor told me that most social problems can be cured with a shot of penicillin.

RobTheDrummer · Post by **RobTheDrummer** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

ToonaRockGuy wrote:WHOA! WHOA! I just posted a joke. I wasn't after a heated discussion on government. We've debated all this before. Sorry, but can't we just let this one go, for the sake of my sanity?

What the hell did you expect you friggin idiot!

Mo Lester · Post by **Mo Lester** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

YUP UYP PYU

zman1200 · Post by **zman1200** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

I agree with DMFJ I like Girls with Boobs (Big Boobs) Tom Zzzzzzzzz

Bert|Evil · Post by **Bert|Evil** » Thursday Dec 15, 2005

undercoverjoe wrote:Who brought up war or Nam? That is such a knee jerk reaction it is a cliche by itself.

This is simply because the flaming liberal consensus is frustrated, and they want to draw some connection between Nam and Iraq. In actuality, you’ll only be able to do that in retrospect of both. If Murtha and the other squatters have their way, we will lose the battle within the D.C. beltway… which is exactly how we lost Nam.

Soldiers, Marines, Sailors, and Airmen win the battles, but politicians and diplomats win (or lose) the war.

rain wolf · Post by **rain wolf** » Friday Dec 16, 2005

good joke to start off this post! i actually heard it a looong time ago, but i had forgotten about it! as for some of the other posts, instead of believing everything you see in the news, talk to soldiers that come back from Iraq. the views of iraqi citizens towards our soldiers are quite contrary to what the media wants us to believe. also, read your history books. pacifism allows problems to get bigger, and they eventually end up on your shores anyways. not that i agree with everything about this war, but... i would rather be fighting the war there than here... we are obviously in the right place to fight terrorism if we are getting attacked every day! also, the pacifist view of assuming it is none of your business etc etc etc is the WORST approach, according to history, that you can make when it comes to dictators, and terrorists... history speaks louder than a politician or political party trying to get votes in the next election. it's good though that people argue so much over this stuff, because it shows that everyone is actually starting to care what is going on in other parts of the world, say, outside of PA. also, it took us 8 years in the american revolution to get our freedom. i'm glad those people didn't have to listen to people saying sacrifice is not worth the end result...

rain wolf · Post by **rain wolf** » Friday Dec 16, 2005

a funny saying... i ignore facts that might change my opinion! LOL, No i was actually writing about a social thing that i think is interesting. in france, they charge about the equivalent of $5.00 a gallon for gas, but all of the extra tax on gas goes towards free heatlh care, and free college... so, if you fall and break your leg, you go to the hospital, and you get it fixed for free, and the doctor gets paid by the government. wouldn't that be awesome!

Banned · Post by **Banned** » Friday Dec 16, 2005

Who are you going to believe, me or your lying eyes??

The part about the government paid medicine, well England has that now, and its called Socialized Medicine. Go read an article about how long the wait is to get medical help. A knee replacement surgery wait is something like 18 months. Caridiac procedures take 12 monthe to schedule, many patients are dead by that time.

Everyone talks about the cheap Canadian precription meds, but what many do not hear is that many canucks come here to get medical procedures because of the long waits.

The doctors in these countries are paid very little compared to US docs, so they work at the pace of the PennDOT highway guy leaning on the shovel. Would you want to get important life saving medical procedures by doctors being paid McDonald's wages?

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Conservative/Liberal Joke

Conservative/Liberal Joke

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