How do you...

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boot-man
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Post by boot-man »

i just show em my 12 toungue that can lick the alphabet in 9 different languages and it's on from there.
i got the fries that will cross your eyes!!!!!!
i got the shakes that will make you quake!!!!
i got.......i just got burgers.
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DirtySanchez
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Post by DirtySanchez »

boot-man wrote:i just show em my 12 toungue that can lick the alphabet in 9 different languages and it's on from there.
This post gave me goosebumps.
Usually, I'm the only person who can gross me out.
You should be proud Boot-Man.
Plus everytime I see this emoticon :P , I will now associate it with you.
"You are now either a clueless inbred brownshirt Teabagger, or a babykilling hippie Marxist on welfare."-Songsmith
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Klamachpin
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Post by Klamachpin »

If you REALLY want to take on this crazy adventure, I think it goes something like this: "Hey baby, I've got lots & lots of money or if not, I don't live with Mommy anymore, I've got a nice house, a car, & a good job. I know exactly what I want out of life, I'm a man with a plan. I don't have any hair on my back. You can mold me into the person that you want me to be. I'll talk to you like a love scene in a soap opera. I'll make sure that the fridge is always full with your favorite ice cream & give you massages every night. You'll always get your favorite flowers on your birthday & I'll take you out to eat every Sunday. There'll be plenty of chocolate in our house. I'll stand up for you against the world & defend your honor always. I'll always tell you how pretty & beautiful you are. Tell me to jump, I'll say, "how high"? You'll ALWAYS be right! I'm your hero, knight in shining armor, & a man even your Dad admires. Oh, & I'll always say "God Bless You" when you sneeze. Can we please shag now? Please, pretty please? pretty baby"?
I gave you my heart. Whatever God gave me.
You took to the grave, now it's gone - Tom Evans.
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DirtySanchez
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Post by DirtySanchez »

Klamachpin wrote:If you REALLY want to take on this crazy adventure, I think it goes something like this: "Hey baby, I've got lots & lots of money or if not, I don't live with Mommy anymore, I've got a nice house, a car, & a good job. I know exactly what I want out of life, I'm a man with a plan. I don't have any hair on my back. You can mold me into the person that you want me to be. I'll talk to you like a love scene in a soap opera. I'll make sure that the fridge is always full with your favorite ice cream & give you massages every night. You'll always get your favorite flowers on your birthday & I'll take you out to eat every Sunday. There'll be plenty of chocolate in our house. I'll stand up for you against the world & defend your honor always. I'll always tell you how pretty & beautiful you are. Tell me to jump, I'll say, "how high"? You'll ALWAYS be right! I'm your hero, knight in shining armor, & a man even your Dad admires. Oh, & I'll always say "God Bless You" when you sneeze. Can we please shag now? Please, pretty please? pretty baby"?

That's what they tell us they want, but they're full of shit.
If you really did that, they'd assume you were gay and ask you to go shoe shopping with them. At the very least you'd never get laid and remain in the dreaded "FRIEND ZONE" for eternity.
Meanwhile you'd get to watch every swingin dick that don't give a shit about her tap that ass.
"You are now either a clueless inbred brownshirt Teabagger, or a babykilling hippie Marxist on welfare."-Songsmith
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metalchurch
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Post by metalchurch »

That's funny. That's how marriages originate. Then they get fat from the Chocolates and the Ice Cream, and lazy from being waited on all the time.
It would be more financially efficient to just pay for the sex up front. Wish I would have thought of that sooner.

My favoriate saying is 'Yeah, I'll do it tomorrow'
LOL
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DirtySanchez
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Re: How do you...

Post by DirtySanchez »

metalchurch wrote:That's funny. That's how marriages originate. Then they get fat from the Chocolates and the Ice Cream, and lazy from being waited on all the time.
It would be more financially efficient to just pay for the sex up front. Wish I would have thought of that sooner.

My favoriate saying is 'Yeah, I'll do it tomorrow'
LOL
LOL if your GF lurks rockpage and sees this post.
"You are now either a clueless inbred brownshirt Teabagger, or a babykilling hippie Marxist on welfare."-Songsmith
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metalchurch
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Post by metalchurch »

Lol, yeah no kiddin'!
She'll ban me.
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YankeeRose
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Post by YankeeRose »

:shock: Some of you dudes I know for a fact are joking, and still others don't seem to like women very much, other than, well, ya know. :roll: Your loss, as most of us are actually very nice PEOPLE, once you get to know us. (As with men, there are exceptions to every rule! :wink:)




Colton, it all depends on what you are seeking from a chick. A heh, short term, or long term relationship. I'm sure there are plenty of single women around your age who are interested in either one. I say be yourself, be honest about what you're seeking, and you can't go wrong.
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metalchurch
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Post by metalchurch »

My apologies m'lady if I offended you.
I am very much joking about all of this. I forget sometimes that there are ladies present.
Nice that you keep a good sense of humor amidst all of this talk.
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YankeeRose
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Re: How do you...

Post by YankeeRose »

metalchurch wrote:My apologies m'lady if I offended you.
I am very much joking about all of this. I forget sometimes that there are ladies present.
Nice that you keep a good sense of humor amidst all of this talk.


Why, thank you kind Sir. Honestly, not much offends me, and 'twas simply an observation on male/female relations, if you want to call them that. :)
Verily, methinks thou art most concerned yon girlfriend might peruse thine ramblings and cut ye off! :lol: :lol: :lol:
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Charltor
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Re: How do you...

Post by Charltor »

metalchurch wrote:I think you just need to impress them as opposed to baffling them with Bullshit.
Just lay it on the line and let 'em know who they're messin with.

New duds and a new car will help. These are essential tools to succeed:

Image

Image

Image

Image


LOL!!!
LMFAO...that was classic!!!!!
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HarleyRo1
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Post by HarleyRo1 »

Bobby...nice new penis you're sportin' there!
Who needs gold and diamonds when you can have chrome....
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HurricaneBob
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Post by HurricaneBob »

Thanks Ro!

I got it from that childrens book.
See Dick Run!
generationgap
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Post by generationgap »

HarleyRo1 Wrote:

Bobby...nice new penis you're sportin' there!


Hurricane wrote:Thanks Ro!

I got it from that childrens book.
See Dick Run!

:shock: :shock: :shock: LMAO That's A Classic..........
Your never too young or too old to Rock n Roll
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Colton
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Post by Colton »

YankeeRose wrote::shock: Some of you dudes I know for a fact are joking, and still others don't seem to like women very much, other than, well, ya know. :roll: Your loss, as most of us are actually very nice PEOPLE, once you get to know us. (As with men, there are exceptions to every rule! :wink:)




Colton, it all depends on what you are seeking from a chick. A heh, short term, or long term relationship. I'm sure there are plenty of single women around your age who are interested in either one. I say be yourself, be honest about what you're seeking, and you can't go wrong.
Thanks for the sound advice Donna, appreciate it. This thread was just to be kinda silly tho :lol: Sorry if this circus offended you or anyone else :!:


And bob... that things nuts...
well... guess its a little more than just nuts...

Think I'm about due for a new avatar
Laugh if you want to, really is kinda funny, 'cause the world is a car and you're the crash test dummy.
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Mistress_DB
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Post by Mistress_DB »

hahaha Bob I love it!
The person below me enjoys a good spanking.
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YankeeRose
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Post by YankeeRose »

Well, if that was inspired by a reading book of my youth, "See Dick play. See Jane play. See Dick and Jane play." has an entirely NEW meaning! :twisted: :lol: :lol: :lol:
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