"We don't play that."

songsmith · Post by **songsmith** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 4:32 am

Okay, so last week I was at The Post doing the sit-down lazy-ass steel guitar thing with the Blind Jonny boys... some clown asks if they do any Clapton. Red says, "No, but that's good stuff," which is word-for-word what I've been telling people who ask for songs I don't play. It's quick, makes them happy you like their taste in music, and when they walk away, you can mutter under your breath.
When people like what we do, and make requests of like-minded songs, hey, nothing wrong with that... but when they ask our classic-rock band for Neil McCoy's "The Shake," or Megadeth, then get genuinely pissed if you don't play it, what can you do?

So.... how do you nicely tell people you don't/won't/can't play their song?---------------------------------------------------->JMS

HurricaneBob · Post by **HurricaneBob** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 6:07 am

Out of any requests the most ive always heard was AC/DC. Granted i love the band but we dont cover them. Thats another reason we try not to mess around in between songs and keep it rolling. Felix usually says sorry we dont do that and busts in to another tune. If they come up on stage and try to yell in our ears they usually get told we will talk on the break, were trying to play here. It dont hurt either if your 6' 4" 250...LOL.

But thats what i love about our following, they know what we do and we always play what they what, Free Bird or not. Keeps em coming back.

There have been tons of songs weve pulled out of our ass too and some were train wrecks that id like to forget but it pleased the drunks. Some of the tunes we picked up came from requests that we tried and did well so we kept the tune.

Peter C's is a great gig though, most requests are our original songs.

lonewolf · Post by **lonewolf** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 11:55 am

What is Neil McCoy?

Tell them it sucks donkey dongs and to go away or you will taunt them another time.

Actually, I offer up a few tunes closer to their request to see if that will keep them happy. It helps to be a good negotiator.

nakedtwister · Post by **nakedtwister** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:14 pm

Yeah thats what I would do Lonewolf tell the patrons that they suck. A sure way to end up doing karaoke the rest of your life in some shit hole. To you John I think you either have to tell the people kindly that you dont do that song or type of music, but maybe will work on it for a later show if enough requests warrant it.

lonewolf · Post by **lonewolf** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:24 pm

nakedtwister, you should try reading an entire post, focusing your reading comprehension and sharpening up your sense of humor before posting a nasty reply.

nakedtwister · Post by **nakedtwister** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:31 pm

Sorry Wolf stupid ass computer has a virus and sometimes the whole post doesnt show.

bassist4life2004 · Post by **bassist4life2004** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:32 pm

if they request it at the beginning of the show, tell them its in the third set, if you are in a bar they will be drunk by the third set. After the show, walk up to them and ask "So, how did you like our little rendition of 'song name here" and when they say "Oh shit, i missed it!" You say "Oh, well, maybe you can see us do it at our next show!

tornandfrayed · Post by **tornandfrayed** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:42 pm

It must be a politically aware virus that selectively disects and disseminates info and then spits out what it feels is relevent. I hope I get that virus when the next political shots are fired and then I will have something to blame my intellectual inadequacies on!

http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=inadequacies

Peace

lonewolf · Post by **lonewolf** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:43 pm

nakedtwister wrote:Sorry Wolf stupid ass computer has a virus and sometimes the whole post doesnt show.

That's OK. It's difficult to spot facetious humor on a message board, because it can seem serious. A lot of people misread my posts because of that. I will just have to keep practicing my sarcasm.

nakedtwister · Post by **nakedtwister** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:49 pm

Ok then I'll do like the democrats and blame it on Bush.....

dplisco · Post by **dplisco** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:53 pm

Ken,

"After the show, walk up to them and ask "So, how did you like our little rendition of 'song name here""

That's brilliant man. Where we are you get the constant "Ozzy"/AC/DC/Skynrd/Metallica/
Megadeth" yells. I pretty much just tell them we don't play it and it's not really us, BUT
there are guys around they should get out who DO play that stuff, and very well.

Problem is that people are used to hearing the same songs because so many bands do
them, but the same people complain when the only Metallica someone does is "Enter
Sandman". It's a big catch22 for bands. Play what they hear those few people asking
for but have people who are sick to death of hearing that stuff not come out to see them
BECAUSE they're playing the same, tired stuff.

Basically, we just play what we like and will build crowds on the fact that we ARE doing
different stuff and have a blast doing it.

THAT being said, the next show we do I'm goin' to give your idea a shot to see their reaction.

DaveP.

BDR · Post by **BDR** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 12:54 pm

lonewolf wrote:I will just have to keep practicing my sarcasm.

It's a losing battle, 'Wolf. You just gotta decide to stay mean and screw 'em all.

r:>)

FatVin · Post by **FatVin** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 3:19 pm

Unfortunatley, I don't have the time to post the EPIC friggin NOVEL I could rant about this particular subject. But for us we get several basic types:

WARNING: THE FOLLOWING CONTAINS SARCASM, ELEMENTS OF PARODY AND FACETIUOS COMMENTS, READ CAREFULLY

Idiot Type 1: (Cluelessius Moronicus, Major) This type listens to half a set of B.B. King and Stevie Ray Tunes, sees several women dancing and most of the audience getting into it and decides that our setlist isn't complete with out GodSmak or Pantera

We generally ignore this one cause 9 times out of ten he, and it's almost always a he, was wasted at 8pm when we began setting up.

Type 2 (Cluelessius Moronicus, Minor) This one gets it that we're not gonna play Godsmak or Pantera but insists on hearing some other tune or group that we just don't do like BTO or the AC/DC or the Doors

This one is only slightly more sober that Type 1 so we give him what he wants, sort of...We play Backdoor man (a Howling Wolf tune that the doors also covered) or the dreaded Roadhouse blues (BTW, just because you put the word "blues" in a song title doesn't make it blues) This is also why we started playing The Jack. We also began doing our Sweet little Werewolves medley to quiet down this one.

Type 3 (Knowitallasaurus Geekius) This annoying creature tries to bust the bands balls by asking for a song that while probably is within the genre but requires special equipment (like the London Symphony Orchestra or the Mormon Tabernacle Choir)to play properly, or is so obscure that only the most cloistered of musical monks has even heard of it.

This Type doesn't want to hear the tune as much as he wants to demonstrate his UberGeek prowess to the band, we usually let him rattle on for a few minutes and offer him another song by that artist or some other rarely heard chesnut, if possible while complying with another request from Type 2 or Type 4.

Type 4 is my favorite (Slutus Intoxicus) Baby Girl just wants to dance to music she knows. For some reason (an odd reaction to alcohol that should be studied by medical science, I suspect) her ability to count to four is connected to the part of brain that remembers lyrics so unless she's heard the song a billion times it is not danceable to her.

but since the only music she's ever heard comes from the paltry list of tired old wedding songs permitted on Altoona Airwaves she's probably not too familiar with anyone's set list, Buy her a drink and play something familiar, for us that's ZZ Top or George Thorogood and it usually does the trick, if you're lucky She''ll blow ya, later.

Theese are not the only annoying little monsters inhabiting our world but they are among the most annoying, I hope this little primer has been helpful.

BDR · Post by **BDR** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 3:27 pm

Vin, how dare you make a reference to women in the derogatory? They are not objects and I'm highly offended by your sexist comments. Would you let someone talk about your girlfriend like that? I didn’t think so ...

r:>)

FatVin · Post by **FatVin** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 3:33 pm

"Okay" said the Kettle, responding to shouts of the Pot.

girlfriend watching you post there, Rob?

Banned · Post by **Banned** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 3:38 pm

With the recent discussions about people with guns at clubs/bars, be
careful not to use the response (when asked for a stupid song request)
"not even at gunpoint"; you may end up with one pointed at you these days.

Scary!

Can't we all just get along?

You can't please everyone, unfortunately.

FatVin · Post by **FatVin** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 3:40 pm

Important Safety tip

With the recent discussions about people with guns at clubs/bars, be
careful not to use the response (when asked for a stupid song request)
"not even at gunpoint"; you may end with one pointed at you these days.
Scary!

Important Safety tip

tornandfrayed · Post by **tornandfrayed** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 3:42 pm

Peter Griffin

"Why do women have breasts?"

"So you have something to look at while your talking to them!"

BDR · Post by **BDR** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 3:56 pm

BadDazeRob wrote:Vin, how dare you make a reference to women in the derogatory? They are not objects and I'm highly offended by your sexist comments. Would you let someone talk about your girlfriend like that? I didn’t think so ...

r:>)

esa, in reference to a recent Woofburger post, wrote:::shrugs:: I find him pathetic. And I question the fact why you guys are praising him for anything he writes here but would be the first person to drag him out into a parking lot to beat the snot out of him if he treated your woman like he talks about them here.
I honestly have no idea why there is such a fascination about him and his stories of stupid "stud-pitity".
I guess I have a little more sense of self worth for me and the female population than some others do. ::shrugs once more:: But then again, I'm a "dumb broad who only desires the cock and wants to be treated like shit by men," so what do I know?

Just a little more sarcasm for the pile ... OOPS, I forgot to use that disclaimer ...

WARNING: MY PREVIOUS POST, ALONG WITH MOST OF MY OTHER POSTS, CONTAINS SARCASM, ELEMENTS OF PARODY AND FACETIOUS COMMENTS, READ CAREFULLY

r:>)

songsmith · Post by **songsmith** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 4:29 pm

Man , that's a good one about saying you played the song... I'd try that, but I bet they'd make you play it again. I've played Margaritaville as many as 4 times in one day (different gigs).---->JMS

songsmith · Post by **songsmith** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 4:30 pm

And this sarcasm you all speak of, is it like an orgasm? I like those.--->JMS

moxham123 · Post by **moxham123** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 5:04 pm

This is always something that happens every gig we play.

People seem to think that we know every song ever written and they get mad when we don't know their favorite Eagles, Pink Floyd, Ozzy Osbourne, AC/DC, Lynyrd Skynyrd, George Thorogood, Metallica, or Creedence Clearwater Revival song.

We get the obvious requests for songs that we could never do no matter what like The Electric Boogie (which most people think is called The Electric Slide, which is the dance that goes along with this stupid song), The Macarena, or any Pink Floyd song that requires 50 keyboards,

There are the people who after the first time you tell them politely that you do no play the song they requested keep asking for the same song every 10 minutes. They think that if they keep asking for it, somehow we can magically learn it while we are playing our other tunes. Our reply is - "We did not learn that song since the last time you asked for it".

Sometimes we will say "We don't play that tune; but , we can play one that is like it." or "We don't play that song; but, how about we play this one (at which time we suggest a totally different song and they usually agree)"

We might say "We don't know that one, but we will play this one instead and go into our next song no matter what it is"

My favorite comeback is "We don't play the song; but, we will play one that has some of the same notes"

ASB10 · Post by **ASB10** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 5:19 pm

Them - "Play Blister in the Sun...."

Me - "Sorry we don't know it....."

Then accidently one of us begins to play that little riff.....

Them - "See I know you guys know it....."

Me - "No...really we need to keep playing....sorry"

Them - "Well, (insert other local band name here) plays it, and they're batter than you"

Me - "Yes.....yes they are....because they know everything that we don't and they can please your sorry ass"

BDR · Post by **BDR** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 5:44 pm

Being the typical singer, I usually say something like, "Well, I know that one, but I don't think our bass player does. Tell you what, I'll check ..." then they go get another beer and hopefully they forget about the exchange.

Of course, that never happens and they hound me for the rest of the night.

r:>)

HurricaneBob · Post by **HurricaneBob** » Wed Oct 05, 2005 6:07 pm

I bet you hate this one too...Hey Rob, play an original tune!

Wow! This sarcasm stuff is fun!

rockpage.net

"We don't play that."

"We don't play that."

I knew it!

Brilliant!

Hmmmm